Part of the beauty of the Islaamic system and the precision applied in legislating its rulings is that conditions exist for every contract which are applied, and in so doing establishes limits/constraints within which they are carried out and sustained. So, every contract has conditions without which the contract is incomplete. And this is clearly indicative of the Islaamic rulings and its perfectness, since it came from One Who is All-Wise and knows all that is good for His creation. So He has legislated for them that by which their religious and worldly affairs are improved so that the situation does not become chaotic and without limits. One of these contracts is the contract of nikaah; and the contract of nikaah has conditions, and we shall mention the important ones here:
1) Consent of both parties: So it is incorrect to force either the man or the woman to marry each other, if they do not so desire. Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) says:
{O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will…} (Soorah an-Nisaa., Aayah 19)
And the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«A virgin should not be married until her approval is sought», and they said: O Messenger of Allaah, what form will her agreement take? He said:
«That she remains silent.»
So the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) has prohibited the marriage of a woman who has not consented; and this includes the virgin and the divorcee or widower. However, in the case of the latter, her verbal consent is imperative, but for the virgin, silence is sufficient since it is possible that she may be shy in (verbally) indicating her consent.
If she is not interested in getting married, then it is not permissible for anyone to force her, even her father, as mentioned in the hadeeth:
«…and regarding the virgin, then her father is to seek her consent.»
And there is no sin upon her father if he does not marry her off in such a situation, because she herself is not interested. However, he must (continue to) maintain and protect her.
If two individuals were to seek her hand in marriage and she expresses a preference for one over the other, and her walee wants her to marry the other, then she is to be married off to the one she chooses if he is suitable for her. However, if he is not suitable for her, then her walee is to prevent her from marrying him, and as such there is no sin upon him.
2) The walee: The nikaah is not valid if the bride does not have a walee, as the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«There is no nikaah without a walee.»
So if a woman marries herself off, her nikaah is invalid.
The walee is a male adult who is an adult, responsible person among her closest male relatives (from her father's side), such as the father, or grandfather (father's father), the son, the grandson, (son's son), the blood brother, the father's brother, the father's uncle and their children.
As for the mother's brother, his children and the grandfather (mother's father), then they do not Islaamically have any guardianship over her.
Since it is imperative for her to have a walee, and it is obligatory upon the walee to choose the most suitable and the most ideal partner for her if there are a number to choose from. And if there is only one person who has sought her hand in marriage, and he is suitable and she is pleased with him, then her walee must marry her off to him.
Let's pause for a moment to understand the extent of this major responsibility which the walee undertakes on behalf of the woman Allaah has made him a guardian over. She is therefore a trust upon his shoulders and it is obligatory upon him to take care it and place it in its proper place. Also, it is forbidden for him to hoard her for his own personal goals, or marry her off with other than one who befits her, out of greed for that in which he may give to him. Certainly, this is part of the betrayal of trust and Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) says:
{O you who believe! Betray not Allaah and His Messenger, nor betray knowingly your Amânât (things entrusted to you)} (Soorah al-Anfaal, Aayah 27).
He also says:
{Verily! Allaah likes not any treacherous ingrate to Allaah} (Soorah al-Hajj 38).
And the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«Each one of you is a shepherd, and each one of you will be questioned about his flock.»
(Unfortunately) you find some suitable people who seek a woman's hand in marriage from her walee, and her walee simply continues to reject one after the other. So, whoever is found to be like this, then his guardianship over her becomes nullified and another walee from the closest of those who qualify (for the responsibility) should marry her off.
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